Trauma Affects Us All

So here we are (Again), August 8th. Cincinnati, Ohio. Government Square. Around 7:40 am., news broke of another police shooting. According to reports, the Jawari Porter (who had a history of mental health and was experiencing homelessness), robbed a neighborhood Kroger grocery store then made their way to a transit station an hour so later. When police arrived on the scene (Government Square), they  address the Jawari, who is walking down the street, but when Jawari hears them he turns around. At this point, according to reports, the man responded to the police (there were two officers in an SUV) by asking “why, are you going to shoot me?” At this point, the turn of events go badly. The situation is unclear, but by watching the video, we see the Jawari approach the police vehicle, walk around the open door and began to strike the officer on the driver’s side. The officer on the passenger side radios a message, comes around the vehicle, grab and throw Jawari to the ground. We can only assume that this is the point where the police shot Jawari. According to reports, multiple shots were fired.

Hearing these details paint a certain picture about the situation and the people involved. It also brings up a lot of questions. Should suspects with a history of mental illness be treated differently than any other suspect? If the suspect had a known history of mental illness, why wasn’t a professional with specific experience on the scene? Should officers interact differently with people who suffer from mental illness. Should officers arrive on the approach suspects with their weapons ready?  Is the use of deadly force ever an effective, humane solution? Why are there so many of these videos?

Depending on your politics, you may have an answer for most of these questions. For the rest of us, the answers to these questions are hard to figure out. Why? Because many of these decisions are subjective/dependent on the situation. Some of us like myself have many people in my life who with mental illness. We understand that sometimes you have to change your strategy when dealing with mental illness. We both know that it takes a special person to effectively deescalate this population. My mother is a home group home administrator for people with cognitive disabilities. She has been in this business for over twenty years. Some of my first memories interacting with adults involve me sitting down with Mirna (name changed obviously) and her sharing the stories of Special Olympic gold medals (they were for bowling, soft ball throw, and 50 meter dash), Micheal Jackson albums, and government sanctioned forced sterilization of people with mental health issues (yeah we did that, maybe we still do).

We live in a society full of addictions, hate rhetoric, overt and subversive kyriarchy, distrust and fear. All of these things cause psychological trauma. They affect us everyday and some of us don’t realize it. They create the need to steal to survive. They create officers who are trigger happy. They create citizens who can hear about a police shooting and turn on Finding Nemo in one motion. We need to acknowledge that issues of oppression hurts everyone. We need to ackn0wledge that systematic violence has made us both numb and engaged. Mental health needs to be acknowledged. That doesn’t mean we should only focus on reactive solutions, but preventative solutions also. How can we ensure everyone has support for their mental health needs before an emergency arises?

We know we have legislation for people with disabilities (Americans with Disabilities Act). But, we need to push it further. We need to ensure that all public officials are required to get competency training for working with special populations. There should also be a mental health trained officer on every beat. I am not saying the situation would have ended differently, but perhaps a trained professional would have approached an agitated person with mental health differently (without the gun drawn in a  calm manner). My suppositions aren’t as important as my message. In order to stop violence, we have to be willing to quit using violence to enforce the law. They say you get out of life what you put in to it. So if you put in oppression, what do you expect to get out of it.

Resources:

Commonly Asked Questions About the Americans with Disabilities Act and Law Enforcement

Interacting with Law Enforcement: A Guide for Persons with Disabilities –

WebMD Mental Health Center

How Reading Tarot Helped Me Become Unapologetically Black and Queer

Many people don’t know this about me, but I like to read Tarot Cards. No, I am not some stereotypical card reader (if there is a such a thing) following a circus caravan, dressed in scarves and beads, or speaking of ill omens and twin flames. Is this true? Do you conjure spirits with tarot? I am your run of the mill, tarot practitioner who uses the power of the cards for daily reflection, meditation and occasional reading for another. Before you ask, yes, black people read tarot. And yes, there are many readers who are queer.

So what is Tarot?

If you are unfamiliar with the Tarot, let me take a step back and explain. Tarot Cards date all the way to the 15th century. Originally used as a “parlor activity” in France and Italy, tarot became a tool used by mystics and occultist around the 18th century. It is important to note that not everyone uses the cards for divination. Some people just like the looks of the cards (many decks have beautiful art on them) while others just like to look at them and acknowledge the symbolism and meaning for personal amusement. Not everyone has to turn their tarot reading from a hobby to a business. It is important to acknowledge that there is no one way to use tarot cards. You should find how they are most useful to you to get true benefit from the practice.

It is important to acknowledge that there is no one way to use tarot cards. You should find how they are most useful to you to get true benefit from the practice.

The queer and gender non-binary community has always found a place of welcoming among the mystics, pagans and spiritualists. Heck, there are whole covens and fey families who proactively support and encourage fluidity of gender sexual orientation (i.e.: Alexandrian Wicca or the Brotherhood of the Phoenix. While every aspect of the every mystic/pagan group isn’t inclusive, many of them are built on the tenets of praising the sacred spirit, loving one’s neighbor and their uniqueness, and flourishing as an individual. These types of central tenets invite a “come as you are” atmosphere open to many who are marginalized by religiosity and hetero-normative culture.

So what does Tarot have to do with my blackness and my queerness?

Well, as stated before the tarot allows some people time to self-reflect and mediate. During times of racial injustice and systematic violence, one has to learn self care. For both the mental, physical and psychological. Tarot allows me to get spiritual guidance for how to self heal. When I am feeling overwhelmed, I do a simple one card spread reading to help frame my psyche or a three card spread to see what I can learn from my past and future to help me lead with purpose in the present. Tarot cards are a tool for a practitioner. The energy comes from you, so experiment with using cards in your own way. Your spirituality and practice can be one in the same or mutually exclusive.  The point is that you can use the cards how you like.

Tarot cards are a tool for a practitioner. The energy comes from you, so experiment with using cards in your own way. Your spirituality and practice can be one in the same or mutually exclusive.

As far as queerness is concerned, I have found community in the mystic/fey community. They are some of the most accepting and liberally-minded people I have met. For many queer people, we have been marginalized by religion or religious institutions. It is welcoming to find a community that accepts, supports and encourages us to be ourselves. This time of welcoming community is what many people of the queer spectrum wish to find. A sense of community and support has been proven to lead to the happier lives of queer people. So, creating this community of caring may not eliminate all the hate and violence from the lives of LGBT people, but it make the healing bearable. It helps with feelings of isolation. At least, it makes things feel better.

But, isn’t this evil magic or devil working?  

Gurl, Bye! We need to lead with empathy and an open mind. Using cards to meditate and focus is the same as using any item to focus whether it be a candle, bible, moon, or natural object. It is more about the spiritual guidance and growth and less about the tool or belief system. Spiritual practices like tarot are deeply personal and have little to do with religion. It has more to do with faith (in yourself, your community, and your spiritual self). There are many readers who are Christian, Jewish, Hindu, Buddhist, etc. Readers come in all shapes, sizes, genders, and sexual identifications. There is no need to apply closed-minded thoughts to a practice that is commonly used throughout the world.

Just tell me how reading tarot cards made you unapologetically black and queer, will ya?

Being a marginalized minority has led to bouts of isolation, depression, anger and self-hate. It is hard to exist in the world when your identity is constantly challenged. Just like our gender is politicized, so it our sexual orientation and spirituality. Before tarot, I used to look towards the outside world to get my answers. I would ask myself questions. Why are black men being killed? Why do people have hate for trans/non-binary people? How can I move on from this point? I would allow the words of media and friends shape my believes and values. I was relying on others to solve MY problems.

It was through tarot that I learned to answer some of these questions on my own. I learned that many of the answers, while having real-world explanation, left me still feeling unsafe and unheard. I learned that there is more than one answer and there can be more than one outcome. The tarot helped me acknowledge these feelings and figure out what I was going to do next. On one occasion, I was troubled with thoughts of expressing my queer self and being verbally harassed or hiding my true self for self preservation. I used the one card spread and pulled a Ten of Swords card. This card signifies that there may be ruckus going on now, but that it will soon be dispelled. It let me know that decisions are tough, but they are only temporary. The goal is to persevere. It was comforting to find this out in the comfort of my home in pjs. It was nice to know that I had an outlet to express and discuss these things. It was great knowing that I could openly ask my other friends of the tarot for their interpretation of the card without it totally overwriting my own. It was awesome know I wasn’t alone.

Source

The tarot can be useful for practitioners and fans alike. They provide introspective imagery and encourage free thought. They help me to make sense of the world through symbols and meanings. They allow me the opportunity to feel included in an open-minded community. They allow me to be #blackqueermagic. All tarot isn’t created equal and neither are we, so who am I to shut out guidance when it brings me peace. It is important to have faith in something, and tarot allowed that something to be me.

Queers for Solidarity Over Pride

Happy Pride Folx! It is that time of year to dance in the streets, meet new queers and build community. This week, June 21-26, is Cincinnati Pride. And guess what? We have a parade. The Cincinnati Pride parade is one of the oldest LGBT pride parades in the country. Heck, it is the third biggest parade in the city of Cincinnati. Many top companies and community organizations raise funds, participate, and support Cincinnati Pride… at least on paper (Library Board Says no to Transgender Benefits). Thousands of people crowd to streets to cheer for floats, hand out stickers, and spend their money. It would be an understatement to say that LBGT communities impact the city’s culture and economy. Does that “buying power,” mean Cincinnati is a welcoming, supportive and inclusive space for queer (or LBGTQ) people?  Is there still work to be done?

---

June was designated as Pride Month, a time when people, communities, and organizations could celebrate the history, accomplishments, and diversity of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer (including non-binary/gender non-conforming) individuals and communities.

Initially, Pride month was to show reverence to the 1969 Stonewall Riots, a civil uprising led by queer and transgender people of color. Police raided New York gay bars and arrested people (mostly queer and trans people of color) on criminal counts of serving alcohol to queer people and men dancing with men. During these raids they specifically targeted trans and gender non-conforming people. As the QPOC were being carted off, a crowd just watched. A gender non-conforming person was fighting police back and asking for help. Everyone watched until a trans-latinx women threw a brick at police. At this point all heck broke loose. Queer people rioted in the streets. The queer and trans people, mostly drag queens, sex workers and the truly marginalized formed Queer activist groups. It was through their work that gay rights became a national issue.

Queer people were viciously attacked by police and forcefully arrested, while politicians enacted policies to further dampen their ability to live. Although, you wouldn’t know that Marsha P. Johnson, Miss Major Griffin-Gracy, or Sylvia Rivera were even there if you based your knowledge on the Stonewall Movie (2015). The History of Queer has been white-washed and morphed into an activity for capital gain. Tell me again how Bud Light is queer or Chipotle is queer uplifting. It has been a long and abusive process that continues to present day. There are still sodomy laws on the books in many states. You can still be “fired while queer.” I mean marriage equality literally just happened a year or so ago.

Today, Pride still celebrates the lives of queer individuals, but we sometimes get caught up in all the hooray. So much so that we forget that almost 40% of homeless youth identify as LGBT. Or that one can be evicted from their housing for being (suspected) queer.

This month has become full of boozy parties, shirtless people and dance floors full of foam and glitter. I am not completely complaining because part of celebration involve dancing and merriment (Pro-tip: if you wear baby oil on your skin it keeps the foam down), but I am concerned that our need for “safe spaces” are  considered second behind who will headline, or being open-minded and LETTING ANTI-GAY  RELIGIOUS GROUPS WALK IN THE PARADE. Some of these things are outside of the control of the Pride Committee, while others are not. We, the Queers, are tired of turning the other cheek to oppression. At this point, all four of them are bruised and abused. We have waited long enough for laws and policies to reflect our inclusion in society.

Bathroom bills are another way that basic human rights are being denied to LGBT people. It not only hurts queer people, but also non-conforming identities as well. Many androgynous straight women are being harassed and followed into bathrooms thanks to vigilante “gender checkers.”

As I reflect on Pride Month, I can’t help wanting to do something to change how Pride is celebrated. I want Pride to be an inclusive place where different bodies, gender expressions and perspectives are highlighted. I would like to see trans-issue take a front row seat at our conversation tables. I want us to work with social service agencies to ensure that LGBT people are getting efficient services, instead of being turned away. Yesterday, I finished a training with the Safe and Supported Program of Lighthouse Youth Services. Safe and Supported has a mission mission is to end LGBT youth homelessness in Hamilton County, connect youths to resources and services, and build a support network of agencies and individuals sustain the work. WE NEED TO HELP SUSTAIN PROGRAMS LIKE THIS ONE. I know it is hard to be “on” and stay “woke” while having a good time at Pride, but we must make an effort to work, work, work, work, work… and practice supportive activism as well.

So, what are some strategies we can implement to support our LGBT community?

• First, we can support the LGBT youth who are experiencing homelessness. Helping them as youth can potentially deter other negative consequences they may experience as adults.
• Insist that community organizations, including the social services, community agencies and police undergo competency training to learn how to deal with marginalized groups such as people of color

  and LGBT individuals.

• Question our park boards on why they insist on installing obstructive objects to deter people experiencing homelessness from using their facilities. Spikes on perimeter walls and bars in park benches are physical signs of exclusion and we shouldn’t be moving in that direction.
• We need to hold our political leaders accountable for supporting oppressive laws and policies that target LGBT people and other marginalized communities. Finally, we need to support our compatriot groups such as Black Lives Matter, Radical Feminists, and Palestinian Liberation groups.

I hope you take this as a conversation starter, and not a judgement. It is okay to enjoy the festivities, have a libation and dance shirtless on a speaker. But, make sure you pull your non-binary, trans, and economically disadvantaged queers up with you.

 

Reclaim Your Queer!

So, I am finally home after an epic/intense/rejuvenating weekend with friends, loved-ones, and new (Bonna)family. It was a great experience for me because I needed a recharge. I truly feel like Bonnaroo Music and Arts Festival is home. It is a home, a safe haven, and a getaway for many of us queers (LGBT if you wanna play the game). We are free to hold hands, kiss, caress and just live without fear and anxiety. That is the type of place Bonnaroo has come to be. For many queers (both young and old), gay bars and clubs are the same safe haven and place of community.

As an out, queer, non-gender identifying MAB polyamourous pansexual who is slightly gender non-conforming… it is rough living in society where hate is rampant. There is not a day that passes where I am not harassed, aggressed or catcalled. I have been so emotionally, physically, and psychologically exhausted with life and it’s necessaries that I have to get away annually. We need to get to place in society where POC and Queer people don’t have to get away to find solidarity and inclusion.

While I am happy to be home, I am sad to come home to the news of tragedy, hate and oppression. I am speaking of the mass shooting in Orlando. I won’t go there to name the murderer, but know this was an act of self hate, discrimination, prejudice and homophobia. This was facilitated by America’s willingness to other queer people, especially QPOC and gender non-conforming people of color.

It takes work and emotional labor to live life when the body is political. Racism, sexism, transphobia, homophobia, islamaphobia, patriarchy and other systems of oppression all exists to tear us apart. This is our time to come together and support those who need it. Hug your neighbor. Call a friend. Spend time with a stranger. We need to protect each other from violence and hurt the best we can. We need to value each other for our differences and learn to welcome the unknown and not fear it. Also, we need to be visible (show your weird, your queer, your quirk, your feminism, your gender expression, etc.). Only when we pull back the curtain of ignorance do we learn the truth. So let’s lead with empathy and love instead of hate and misunderstanding.

You Have a Right To Your Body

Trigger Warning: This post discusses rape/sexual assault Please be aware that some of the descriptions may be triggering to some.

---

Unless you have been hiding under a rock, or you are in total denial, you have most likely heard the horrendous story of the Stanford rapist, Brock Turner. He is a 20 year old first-year and sexual assaulter. To briefly describe the turn of events, this freshman decided to take advantage of an unconscious woman behind a dumpster and forcefully (and I would argue knowingly) sexually assaulting her body. He was caught in the act by two students on bikes (thank you Swedes Carl-Fredrik Arndt and Peter Jonsson) who chased him down, tackled him, and called the police. Well, this sad story doesn’t end there. This “person” decides to go to court and deny everything. He will admit to drinking and fondling her body, but not to raping her. To make matter even worse, his white, privileged dad wrote a letter to justify his actions, stating that the “20 minutes of action”will have negative consequences his whole life…in terms of drinking and promiscuity. Say what?!?! Yes, I had to re-read it myself.

These are great- send to all the men in ur life RT @texpatriate 10 Rape Prevention Tips. @lizzwinstead pic.twitter.com/IPfWsaz9zz

— Sarah Silverman (@SarahKSilverman) March 21, 2015

 

I am sorry, but these stories are hard to hear. Doesn’t matter if it is Bill Cosby or Jared the Subway guy who I don’t know… or a religious leader or family member who I do know. Either way it is painful and unnecessary for all parties involved, but especially the victim/survivor. Why are these stories so hard to hear for some, but not others. Particularly, why are women, people of color, and trans individuals  (basically everyone, but white males) the only ones having to worry about bodily harm in public on a daily basis?

Maybe, because they behavior is inexcusable. Maybe, because Brock has the nerve to play the victim. Don’t think you can swim your way out of this. No matter how good you are! Maybe, because there are a number of us (1 in 5 women, 1 in 33 men) who have been that unconscious woman. Like her, our stories have been minimized and swept under the rug of excuses, white privilege, or male fragility… or papal protection. Yes, hunty, I went there.

That is not to say that justice is never served, but I can’t help feeling that it’s “Just us! Never Served!” by the judicial system. The women (both white and of color) and Queer People of Color are usually the forgotten dolls on the playground. We are often dismissed, blamed, or even ignored when we report rape and sexual assault. The mishandling of cases is partially the reason the reported numbers can’t be trusted. Many men and women don’t report their sexual assaults/rapes because they fear the backlash. Or they fear nothing will be done. This case is a good example. The Stanford Rapist (purposefully using this moniker), Brock, only got 6 months in jail, 3 years probation (?) and he has to register as a sex offender. I think that is white privilege at its best. White judge gives young white man a light sentence because it is his first offense (how many assaults does one have to commit?) and reasoning that it may have impact on his future.  Erm, I call bullmalarkey.

I can’t help but question how many times inequity is served in our justice system.

Like most instances of  rape and sexual assault, there is not a single person involved in this failure, but a system of people. There is the ass-aulter, the judges that give lenient sentences, the fathers who defend their rapist children, the media that focuses more on “drunk female students” not “evil, violent male criminals.” We are quick to uphold white hetero-male supremacy (they have a bright future ahead of them, they are an honor student, they play football, etc.) and then demean the victim (unconscious drunk girl, attendant at drunken party, inebriated girl walking alone, it was that gurlz fault, blech). This blaming the victim ploy needs to stop. It doesn’t matter how drunk or drugged a person may be, you need to get consent. Just in case you weren’t in the know, the above adjectives (drunk/drugged) means that they can’t give proper consent. Also, if they are uncoscious at any point (beginning/middle/end) of the encounter… you need stop. Passing out is a direct, no questions asked NO.

You gone keep yo hands to yo-self, or nah?

• It is time to say no to leniency for men who continue to assault women (or anyone for that matter).
• It is time that we stand up to patriarchy, white supremacy, misogyny, and other structures of oppression.
• It’s time we paste the faces of rapists, and call them just that…RAPIST.
• It is not only time to stop the assaults, but also stop the victim blaming. We need to stop telling girls to wear different clothes, guys can’t help it, or you shouldn’t have drank. NO they shouldn’t have raped.

  As a queer, other-gendered identified (MAB) person, I know these times can be hard and uncomfortable. I know that they can be downright scary.But, we need to stick together to end sexual violence. If you see something, say something. Just think, you too can be a guardian angel like Carl-Fredrik Arndt and Peter Jonsson.  The important part is to take care of your neighbor and be a friend.

 

 

The Human Zoo Conundrum

The Story of ,Ota Benga, a Congolese pygmy who was enslaved and forced into human zoo exhibit in New York Bronx Zoo

Photograph: American Museum of Natural History

So this story is NOT an extreme, or an outlier. It was a common practice during the 1800s for Western imperialist to abduct people from “exotic” regions (particularly Pygmy, Khoisan, Siamese, Kayan etc) and display them in human zoos. Actual people were stolen, abused, enslaved and slighted for human zoo entertainment.

Second, lets us state that all of these people had names and cultures that were stripped from them. So Ota Benga was from CONGO, not the monolithic Africa (it cheapens things to call him an African native, because the word native is disrespectful, Africa is a continent not a country, and he deserves to have a story and culture). He was STOLEN and ENSLAVED.

Finally, this was only 100 years ago. That is only like TWO generations ago. So, that means that the hurt, mistrust and oppression (and abduction) of black bodies have been happening for over 100 years now. People literally are dying from the time they are arrested to the time they reach the jail cell. And some people still ask why we don’t trust those in power to have our best interest. That is a shame. The reason WE (as marginalized POC) are fighting this injustice is because we are tired of being oppressed and abused. If you can’t see the connection between human zoos, human trafficking, public lynching, ghettoization of population, the prison industrial complex, and police brutality…. then you need to learn more about history.

Where My Neighbors Goin?

So, I have been on a small hiatus from blogging due to some family things and illness. I am not going to make excuses (no more than I already have), but I must say that life can throw you some curve balls. I haven’t been the only one in a quasi-upheaval tho. My neighborhood has been “goin thru some thangs!” I live in a heavily gentrified area that has literally been bought by a city-funded developer and mostly privatized. So what’s my beef?

Gentrification means many things, but in simple terms it means the process of redevelopment in a neighborhood (including raising the rent and property values) where rich residents move into a divested neighborhood affecting housing prices, community culture, and the long-time residents that occupy the space.

It has been argued that gentrification doesn’t have to be negative, although in most cases it is. The issue at hand is that developers want to make money, so they value market-rate housing over income-reduced/affordable housing. When the housing available is too expensive for long-term residents or people on reduced incomes, they are forced to move farther away from the city center (and its services).

Cincinnati has an opportunity to make right by its citizens and force development to be inclusive of all income levels. WE have a streetcar coming online this year, so it would be great if affordable housing was available near this transportation resource. It is a fact, that most long-term residents in OTR don’t drive because you can walk everywhere. Now, there are some who are AFRAID of the neighborhood, thus they choose to drive, but in general you can get all your needs met by foot.

What are we doing about it?

Thankfully, many long-term citizens aren’t taking this move without a fight. There has been a number of discussions, town hall meetings, and art projects to address the issue of gentrification. Most of them have focused on promoting inclusive development, rather than just stopping all development. It is realized that developers must me intentional in their plans — this means bringing community members to the table — if they want to successfully keep the neighborhood diverse. I am looking forward to see how this plays out, but until then I must be consistently stand up for the everyday and fight negligent development because the residents were hear before anyone thought OTR was cool and hip.

 

 

Black on Black Crime a Myth?

Black Film is Everything

Film is an important aspect to American life. It can take us on a voyage to a far away place, or it can present a place and time in contemporary life. Film gives storytellers an avenue to represent their work and share it with a wide audience. Sadly, there is a lack of support for filmmakers of color and films concerning black life (that isn’t slavery or evil terrorist). That doesn’t mean that they don’t exist. The list of movies based on black villians or negative stereotypes are vast and expansive. I could list them all, but to name a few: Amistad, 12 Years of Slave, Blood Diamonds, The Help, The Butler, etc.

Two of my favorite directors, Ava DuVernay and John Singleton have found a way to carve a niche in Hollywood.  What I appreciate (truly) is their desire to share real stories, grit and all, of black life. It helps keep me grounded and authentic in my representation of my personal story. Whether it is a period drama about civil rights, Selma, or a contemporary inner-city drama, Boyz n the Hood, they share the human condition and reality of living as a person of color.

It should be noted that both films were their directorial debuts, and they both continued to work in Hollywood. While I love these two directors, I wouldn’t be doing the work if I didn’t present you with other black directors. ** For the sake of introducing lesser known filmmakers, I will skip the obvious choices like Spike Lee, Tyler Perry, and Lee Daniels. Not to downplay their contributions, but to  hopefully enlighten readers of other directors in the game

Take a look at this list and tell us what you think. Do you have any to add? Let us know in the comments.

George C. Wolf – Lackawanna Blues

F. Gary Gray – Set it Off

Ernest R. Dickerson – Juice

Kasi Lemmons – Eve’s Bayou

---

For a more complete list, check out these resources.

10 Most Influential African-American Film Directors
Top Black Film Makers Working Today

Black Style is Timeless

100 years of Black Men Trends.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/augustafalletta/100-years-black-men-trends?bffbstyle&utm_term=.jhnvDVbDp#.ppRlYJyY4